The 21 Indispensable Qualities of a Leader By: John C. Maxwell (1999)

I. Overview of the Content & Subject of the book

The 21 Indispensable Qualities of a Leader gets straight to the heart of leadership issues. Maxwell once again touches on the process of developing the art of leadership by giving the reader practical tools and insights into developing the qualities found in the great leaders. Read a chapter, and then give it some time. Use it to reflect, review, and renew. If the quality you’re studying is a weak area in your life, spend some time addressing it before you move on to the next chapter. You may even want to repeat this process several times over the course of the year, cementing each trait into your character.
Everything rises and falls on leadership. And leadership truly develops from the inside out. If you can become the leader you ought to be on the inside, you will be able to become the leader you want to be on the outside. People will want to follow you. And when that happens, you’ll be able to tackle anything in this world.

1. CHARACTER - Be a piece of the rock. Leadership is the capacity and will to rally men and women to a common purpose and the character which inspire confidence.
– Never for the sake of peace and quiet, deny your own experience or convictions.
What must every person know about character?
• Character is more than talk
• Talent is a gift, but character is a choice
• Character brings lasting success with people
• Leaders cannot rise above the limitations of their character
To improve your character, do the following:
a. Search for the cracks.
b. Look for pattern.
c. Face the music.
d. Rebuild
That’s what real character is- being bigger on the inside.

2. CHARISMA - The first impression can seal the deal. Be more concerned about making others feel good about themselves than you are making them feel good about you.
– I have yet to find the man, however exalted his station, who did not do better work and put forth greater effort under a spirit of approval than under a spirit of criticism.
Tomake youself the kind of person who attracts others, you need to personify these pointers.
• Lovelife
• Put a ‘’10’’ on every persons head
• Give people hope
• Share yourself
To improve your charisma do the following:
a. Change your focus.
b. Play the first impression game.
c. Share yourself.

3. COMMITMENT - It separates doers from dreamers. People do not follow uncommitted leaders. Commitment can be displayed in a full range of how you work to improve your abilities, or what you do for your fellow workers at personal sacrifice.
- He who has done his best for his own time has lived for all times.
What is the true nature of commitment?
• Commitment starts in the heart
• Commitment is tested by action
• Commitment opens the door to achievement
To improve your commitment, do the following:
a. Measure it.
b. Know whats worth dying for.
c. Use the Edison method.

4. COMMUNICATION - Without it you travel alone. Developing excellent communication skills is absolutely essential to an effective leadership. The leader must be able to share knowledge and ideas to transmit a sense of urgency and enthusiasms to others. If a leader cant get a message across clearly and motivate others to act on it, then having a message doesn’t even matter.
- Educators take something simple and make it complicated. Communicators take something complicated and make it simple.

5. COMPETENCE - If you build it, they will come. Competence goes beyond words. It’s the leaders ability to say it, plan it, and do it in such away that others know that you know how- and know how that they want to follow you.
- We all admire all people of high competence , whether they are precision craftsman, world class athlete, or successful business leaders. But the truth is you don’t have to be Michael Jordan or Bill Gates to excel in the area of competence.

6. COURAGE - One person with courage is a majority. Courage is rightly esteemed the first human of qualities, because it is the quality which guarantees all others.
- Courage is fear that has said its prayer.

7. DISCERNMENT - Put an end to unsolved mysteries. Smart leaders believe only half only what they hear. Discerning leaders know which half to believe.
-The first role of holes: When you’re in one, stop digging.

8. FOCUS - The sharper it is, the sharper you are. If you chase two rabbits, both will escape.
- What people say, what people do, and what they say they do are entirely different things.

9. GENEROSITY - Your candle losses nothing when it lights another. No person was ever honored for what he received. Honor has been the reward for what he gave.
- Giving is the highest level of living.

10. INITIATIVE - You won’t leave home without it. Success seems to be connected with action. Success people keep moving. They make mistakes, but they don’t quit.
- Of all the things a leader should fear, complacency should head the list.

11. LISTENING - To connect with their hearts, use your ears. The ear of the leader must ring with the voices of the people.
- A good leader encourages followers to tell him what he needs to know, not what he wants to hear.

12. PASSION - Take this life and love it. When a leader out in passion, he is usually met with an answering passion.
- Anyone can dabble, but once you’ve made that commitment, your blood has that particular thing in it, and its very hard for people to stop you.

13. POSITIVE ATTITUDE - If you believe you can. The greatest discovery of my generation is that human being can alter their lives by altering their attitude of mind.
- A successful man is one who can lay a firm foundation with the bricks others have thrown at him.

14. PROBLEM SOLVING - You can let your problems be a problem. You can measure a leader by the problems he tackles. He always look for ones his own size.
- The measure of success is not whether you have a tough problem to deal with, but whether it is the same problem you had last year.

15. RELATIONSHIP - If you get along, they’ll go along. The most important single ingredient in the formula of success is knowing how to get along with people.
- People don’t care how much you know, until they how much you care.

16. RESPONSIBILTY - If you won’t carry the ball, you can’t lead the team. Success on any major scale requires you to accept responsibility. In the final analysis, the one quality that all successful people have is the ability to take on responsibility.
- A leader can give up anything, except final responsibility.

17. SECURITY - Competence never compensates for insecurity. You can’t lead people if you need people.
– No man will make a great leader who wants to do it all himself or get all the credit for doing it.

18. SELF- DISCIPLINE - The first person you lead is you. The first and best victory is to conquer self.
- A man without decision of character can never be said to belong himself. He belongs to whatever can make captive of him.

19. SERVANTHOOD - To get ahead put others first. The true leader serves, Serves people. Serves their best interests, and in so doing will not always be popular, may not always impress. But because true leaders are motivated by loving concern rather than a desire for personal glory, they are willing to pay the price.
– You’ve got to love your people more than your position.

20. TEACHABILITY - To keep leading, keep learning. Value your listening and reading time at roughly ten times your talking time. This will assure you that you are on a course of continuous learning and self-improvement.
- It’s what you learn after you know it all that counts.

21. VISION - you can seize only what you can see. A great leader’s courage to fulfill his vision comes from passion, not position.
- The future belongs to those who are possibilities before they become obvious.

Conclusion...
I enjoyed reading these 21 Indispensable Qualities of a Leader and it all benefited from doing all the exercises in each character. I want to be encouraging every person to keep growing to become a leader. In our church our vision is every member should be a leader also. The only way to become the kind of leader that people want to follow is to keep growing and learning about leadership.

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Read Between The Lines

Another year will be added to my age July 27th. I don't even have any special plans for my birthday this year. Maybe I will just work. No date yet ;)
I want to work, work, work for me to leave my country Philippines to try my luck abroad. With God's will I will have my new job in Bahrain. Success comes by destiny as they say... so we might find out if all of my dreams will become reality soon!...

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Father's Day Ideas

It's time to bestow some affection to the man of the house, your dad.
Here are some suggestions and ideas for father's Day.

Gift. The first thing that comes to mind is buy him a gift. That could be expensive. The difficult part is what could be the ideal gift you can give that is within your budget. It could be simple, just think of what your father loves and what he enjoys most. If he loves sports then buy him something to wear-shoes, jogging pants or any clothing.

Go Somewhere. You can invite your dad for lunch or dinner or treat him to a movie. You can give him a fine wine but never go bar hopping.

Make something special. This could be an album of photos of and your dad at significant times, your childhood, during your birthday's celebration with him or maybe with the two of you just chilling out. You can put caption or dialogues of each photo to make it funny.

Your time is the best. One of the best things that parents can give to their children is the gift of time and children can also give this in return. You can spend the day with your dad, do shine his shoes, wash his car, brew a coffee for him, etc.

Related topics:
Happy Father's Day

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Is your true love your "greatest" love?

What is love? Love is the license to have sex. Love is kind, love is not jealous, or does not keep a record of mistakes. Love is the agony of one, the ecstasy of two, and the downfall of three. Definitions can go on and on. But do we really know the real essence of love? Maybe not? Because if humankind knows, why is it most are hurt, many are left behind, and only few real love stories prevail?
There are so many theories: Physiological, Philosophical, or even Biblical. But no amount of human intelligence can really decipher what love is. Love is not only queer that we think it is, but also queerer than we can think.

Infatuation: It is an insanely intense physical attraction. Infatuation is love of emotion. Many young couples tend to believe that what they are feeling is true. The emotion is too strong that it makes them unreasonable. As a result, teeners tend to forget most of the important things in life like education and good future. Their focus is to pursue that intense feeling, that euphoric feeling. But sadly it is just temporary.

I am not saying that this is just for teeners. Many adults still fall into the trap. This is something biochemical thus even if you are married, or in a serious relationship, you can still find your co-worker sexy, and when his leg brushed up against yours, you might want to go out of the friendship zone. The problem with infatuation is it makes you feel good, it's too addictive, BUT it is also short-lived. Usually, when reality sets in, you are already pregnant, you already cheated on your husband, or you already have ruined a precious relationship.

True love: This one involves enduring commitment, maturity, and communicative relationship. Compared to infatuation, true love grows in a natural pace. It does not push but is willing to wait. For infatuation, couples tend to have sex immediately, while true love waits for the perfect moment. Why? Because it respects. It thinks of the highest good of the other person. Thus, a boyfriend must control his urge if you are fertile, if you cannot because you're tired.

If your partner yells at you, or embarrasses you, it is not true love. True love is tact, sensitive, and has social graces. True love does not broadcast to the world the faults of others. If you tend to tell your friends that your boyfriend sucks in bed, then qualify your feelings. True love endures in silence, and it is never self-centered. However, sometimes true love is not enough. Still it falls short. For example couples drift apart because of a long-distance love affair. The heart becomes lonely and true love can't hold on. True love sometimes fails when family matters or economics interject. The family does not accept, religion does not allow, or same sex marriage is prohibited. True love gives way. True love takes years to forget.

Greatest Love: It is similar to true love but great love transcends. Greatest love is timeless. One lifetime is never enough to consume greatest love. This is the type of love that even the universe conspires for that love to happen. It stands above everything. It outdoes distance, generations, and time. It loves even unreturned. It is unconditional, and can even give up life for the loved one. Does it exist? Yes it does. How do I know? I have one. I don't mind marrying this person everyday, and all the more I won't mind giving up my life even if I only have one breath left.

At the end of the day, hold your partner's hand, close your eyes and think, is he my greatest love? If not, you might want to find your greatest love. Remember, the gods conspire for one great love.

Courtesy of FemaleNetwork.com

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Hugh Jackman: Sexiest Man Alive

HUGH JACKMAN
He's a triple threat: a star who can sing, dance and wield a weapon. At 6 ft. 2 in., all scruff and biceps, Jackman, 40, looms large in the epic Australia, and left people stammering, "Oh ... my ... God," according to costar Nicole Kidman. Jackman's wife of 12 years, Deborra-Lee Furness, calls his perfect form "the Body of Doom – but I like what's inside": a romantic who sings ballads at home and makes pancakes for kids Oscar, 8, and Ava, 3.

Biography
Born: 12 October 1968
Birthplace: Sydney, Australia
Best Known As: Wolverine in the X-Men movies
Hugh Jackman starred in the 1995 Australian television drama Corelli and made his feature film debut in 1998. Early in his film career he got critical raves for his turn in Erskineville Kings (1999). Then he was cast as Logan/Wolverine in the big-budget movie X-Men (2000, also starring Ian McKellen). A stand-out in an ensemble cast, he got the hot-new-star treatment from the celebrity press and earned an international fan following.
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Established as a star on the silver screen, in 2003 he began playing singer/songwriter Peter Allen in the Broadway production of the play The Boy From Oz and won the 2004 Tony Award as best actor in a musical. He has since appeared in Kate and Leopold (2001, with Meg Ryan), the X-Men sequels (2003 and 2006) and Van Helsing (2004, with Kate Beckinsale). In 2006 he appeared in Scoop (with Scarlett Johansson), The Prestige (with Christian Bale) and The Fountain (with Rachel Weisz, and did voice work for the animated comedy Flushed Away.
Hugh Jackman hosted the Tony Awards in 2003 and 2004

Early life
Jackman was born in Sydney, New South Wales, the youngest of five children of English-born parents Chris Jackman and Grace Watson. His mother left the family when he was eight years old, and he remained behind with his father, an accountant with a degree from Cambridge, and siblings.
Jackman attended Pymble Public School and Knox Grammar School, an all-boys school, where he starred in the musical My Fair Lady in 1985, directed by the headmaster, Dr. Ian Paterson. Jackman was School Captain in 1986 and his favourite subject was Ancient History. The following year he spent a gap year working at Uppingham School in England. Upon his return to Australia he worked at a Shell station in Wahroonga and worked as a part-time clown for children's parties while studying at the University of Technology, Sydney. In 1989, Jackman participated in a Christian workcamp on Haast's Bluff and Areyonga Aboriginal land in the Western Desert in Central Australia. He then graduated with a BA in Communications, having majored in journalism. He later used his inheritance from his grandmother to attend the Western Australian Academy of Performing Arts of Edith Cowan University in Perth, Western Australia, from which he graduated in 1994.

Career
Australia
Jackman's early film work includes Erskineville Kings and Paperback Hero (1999), while his television work includes Correlli (where he met his wife Deborra-Lee Furness), Law of the Land, Halifax f.p., Blue Heelers, and Banjo Paterson's The Man from Snowy River (American title: Snowy River: The McGregor Saga).
On stage, Jackman played Gaston in the Melbourne production of Beauty and the Beast, and Joe Gillis in the same city's production of Sunset Boulevard. During his stage musical career in Melbourne, he starred in the 1998 Midsumma festival cabaret production Summa Cabaret. He also hosted both Melbourne's Carols by Candlelight and Sydney's Carols in the Domain.
In 2006, he was cast to replace Russell Crowe in Baz Luhrmann's Australia, starring opposite Nicole Kidman.

United Kingdom
He first became known outside of Australia when he played the leading role of Curly in the Royal National Theatre's acclaimed stage production of Oklahoma! in the West End during 1998. Jackman also appeared in a 1999 film version of the stage musical.

United States
In 2000, he was cast as Wolverine in Bryan Singer's X-Men, replacing Dougray Scott. According to a CBS interview in November 2006, Jackman's wife Deborra-Lee Furness told him not to take the role, a comment she later told him she was glad he ignored.
Jackman, at 6' 2 1/2", stands nearly a foot taller than Wolverine, who is said in the original comic book to be 5' 3". Hence, the filmmakers were frequently forced to shoot Jackman at unusual angles or only from the waist up to make him appear shorter than he actually was. In an interview with Men's Health magazine, he stated that he was also required to add a great deal of muscle for the role. An instant star upon the film's release, Jackman later reprised his role in 2003's X2: X-Men United, and 2006's X-Men: The Last Stand.
Jackman starred as Leopold in the 2001 romantic comedy film Kate & Leopold, for which he was nominated for a Golden Globe Award for Best Actor - Motion Picture Musical or Comedy. Jackman also starred in 2001 action/drama Swordfish, along with John Travolta, and Halle Berry. This would be the second time Jackman would work alongside with Berry, the two would work together twice again in the X-Men movies, making a total of four movies starring Jackman and Berry from 2000 to 2006.
Jackman sang the role of Billy Bigelow in Carousel in a special concert performance at Carnegie Hall in Manhattan, New York City in 2002. In 2004 he played the title role of vampire hunter Gabriel Van Helsing in Van Helsing. In 2004, Jackman won a Tony Award for his Broadway portrayal of Australian songwriter and performer Peter Allen in The Boy from Oz. He hosted the Tony Awards in 2003, 2004 and 2005, garnering very positive reviews. The televising of the 2004 awards earned him an Emmy Award win for Outstanding Individual Performer in a Variety, Musical or Comedy program in 2005.
In 2005 after his award-winning role in The Boy from Oz, Jackman began filming his most challenging role to date. Jackman played the part of three different characters in Darren Aronofsky's sci-fi experience The Fountain. As Tommy Creo a neuroscientist, Jackman played a man who was torn between his wife, Izzi (Rachel Weisz) who is dying of a brain tumor and his work at trying to cure her. As Captain Tomas Creo, a Spanish Conquistador in the year 1532, Savile, Spain who is seeking the mythical Tree of Life for his Queen, Isabel (also played by Weisz) in order to retain her throne. Tomas is a character in the book Izzi is writing called The Fountain, and finally, as the future space traveller Tom enclosed in a transparent treeship seeking to be reunited with Izzi within a dying star called Xibalba. Jackman has stated The Fountain was his most difficult role to date due to the physical and emotional demands his director asked of him in the part. In the end, The Fountain wasn't well received and Jackman went un-rewarded.
Not one to stop working, Jackman filmed The Prestige directed by Christopher Nolan and also starring Christian Bale, Michael Caine, Scarlett Johansson, Andy Serkis, and musician David Bowie. As Robert Angier, Jackman portrayed a magician who built up a rivalry with contemporary Alfred Borden in attempt to 'one up' each other in the art of deception. Jackman stated his main reason for doing The Prestige was to work with David Bowie, who played scientist Nikola Tesla. He also starred in another 2006 film with Scarlett Johansson, Woody Allen's Scoop.
Jackman rounded out 2006 with two animated films: Happy Feet in which he voiced the part of Memphis, an Emperor Penguin and directed by George Miller, and Flushed Away where Jackman also supplied the voice of a rat named Roddy who ends up being flushed down his Kensington family's toilet into the London sewer system. Flushed Away also starred Kate Winslet, Ian McKellen (the fourth time Jackman has worked with him), Jean Reno, Andy Serkis and Bill Nighy.
Jackman has been mentioned several times in the extremely popular American sitcom "Scrubs". Throughout the series, Dr. Perry Cox, portrayed by John C. McGinley, signifies his seemingly irrational hatred of Jackman through his infamous rants.
In 2007, Jackman produced and guest starred in the unsuccessful television drama Viva Laughlin. Viva Laughlin was cancelled by CBS after only two episodes. A decision about the remaining episodes already filmed at the time of cancellation has yet to be made. Both Jackman and his wife Furness were shocked and saddened by this cancellation.
Jackman is also preparing a number of movies which he will both produce and star in, including Wolverine, estimated to begin filming in early 2008, and a remake of Carousel in which he will play Billy Bigelow.
Jackman was also one of the choices to play James Bond but eventually lost out to Daniel Craig He is also currently working on a new comic series, Nowhere Man, with US publisher Virgin Comics and writer Marc Guggenheim. Jackman was chosen as People magazine's Sexiest Man Alive of 2008.

Personal life
Jackman married Deborra-Lee Furness in April 1996. They met on the set of his first TV acting job in Correlli, an Australian television series. Furness had two miscarriages, after which she and Jackman adopted two children, Oscar Maximillian (b. May 15, 2000) and Ava Eliot (b. July 10, 2005). They currently live in Sydney. Jackman personally designed an engagement ring for Furness, and their wedding rings bore the Sanskrit inscription "Om paramar mainamar", translated by Furness as "we dedicate our union to a greater source". In 2005, Jackman joined with longtime assistant John Palermo to form a production company, Seed Productions, whose first project was Viva Laughlin in 2007. Furness is also involved in the company, and Palermo had three rings made with an inscription meaning "unity" for himself, Furness, and Jackman. About the trio's collaboration Jackman reports "I'm very lucky in the partners I work with in my life, Deb and John Palermo. It really works. We all have different strengths. I love it. It's very exciting". Jackman is a longtime supporter of Manly Warringah Sea Eagles, a NRL Rugby League club based in Sydney. He sang the national anthem at the 1999 NRL Grand Final. In an interview with Playboy Jackman mentioned that as a result of his hard training for X-Men Origins: Wolverine, he broke his personal best for bench-pressing which was 300 pounds.


2008 Finalist Film
Australia - The Drover
2009
X-Men Origins: Wolverine - Logan/Wolverine
post-production (Also Producer)

Awards and nominations
Awards
1998 Mo Award for Best Actor in a Musical - Sunset Boulevard
1999 Australian Movie Convention, Australian Star of the Year
2000 Film Critics Circle of Australia Award for Best Actor in a Drama - Erskineville Kings
2001 Saturn Award for Best Actor - X-Men
2004 Drama Desk Award for Outstanding Actor in a Musical - The Boy from Oz
2004 Theatre World Award - The Boy from Oz
2004 Tony Award for Best Leading Actor in a Musical - The Boy from Oz
2005 Emmy Award for Outstanding Individual Performance in a Variety or Music Program - 58th Annual Tony Awards Ceremonies
2008 People Magazines Sexiest Man Alive Award

Nominations
1997 Mo Award for Best Actor in a Musical - Beauty and the Beast
1998 Olivier Award for Best Actor in a Musical - Oklahoma!
1999 Australian Film Industry Award for Best Actor - Erskineville Kings
2002 Golden Globe Award - Kate & Leopold
2006 Emmy Award for Outstanding Individual Performance in a Variety or Music Program - 59th Annual Tony Awards Ceremonies

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Are you alone on February 14th?...

Chinese New Year was just celebrated by the Chinese people around the globe. Now, Valentine’s Day is fast approaching. Valentine's Day is the day to express your love, and to celebrate the spirit of love. Love is a wonderful feeling. And what better way to convey it than with music? Mere words are seldom adequate to describe the different feelings in love, be it the joy, the passion or the ardour. May St. Valentine's blessings shower on you and your sweet one!
The origins of Valentine's Day, like the origins of love itself, are somewhat obscure — a combination of myth, history, destiny, chance and marketing.

Legend has it that a certain third-century priest named Valentine persisted in performing marriage ceremonies despite a ban by the Roman emperor Claudius II (Claudius was persuaded that single men made better soldiers for his army). Thrown into jail, Valentine formed a relationship with his jailor's daughter (some say he cured her blindness) and he signed his last message to her "From your Valentine," a phrase which still gets a lot of mileage.

St. Valentine was executed on February 14, circa the year 270, and his remains (probably his, but there were two other Christian martyrs called Valentine) are now on display in the Whitefriar Street Carmelite Church in Dublin.

There are many symbols that are attached with Valentine’s day and with expression of love.
HEART -- It was formerly believed that the heart was the seat of all human emotions. Accordingly, the gifting of a heart signified the selfless act of giving everything to someone you love. Though the ancients were not aware that the heart was responsible for pumping blood though the circulatory system, yet they knew one thing for sure that the heart was the center of all feelings. This ancient belief has lingered on through the ages.

Ribbons, Laces and Frills -- Ribbons and laces have been associated with love and romance since the days when a knight used to ride into a battle sporting the scarf or handkerchief presented to him by his ladylove. In the bygone times, laces were used making women's handkerchiefs. It was also usual for a lady to drop her handkerchief in the path of the man whose attention she wished to draw.

CUPID -- The love and attraction that a man and a lady feels for one another is traditionally ascribed to the mythological god, Cupid. In Latin, the word Cupid means "desire." Cupid is represented as a naked, chubby boy with wings and possessing a mischievous smile. He carries a bow with a quiver of arrows which he uses to transfix the hearts of youths and maidens.


The ROSES -- From time immemorial, beloveds have been compared to roses. If we juggle the letters of the word ROSE we get EROS, who is the God of Love. Rose has thus been the traditional choice of lovers around the world. The color red is associated with strong emotions and below are listed sentiments expressed by different hues of rose:
Tea Roses -- "I'll Remember Always"
Lavender -- Enchantment and Uniqueness
Orange -- Fascination
Pink (Dark) -- Thankfulness, Friendship and Admiration
Red -- Love, Respect and Courage
Peach -- Modesty, Gratitude, Admiration and Sympathy
Pink (Pale) -- Grace, Joy and Happiness
Deep Red -- Beauty and Passion
White -- Innocence, Purity, Secrecy, Silence, Reverence, Humility and (according to some sources) True Love
Yellow -- Joy, Friendship, Jealousy, Hope and Freedom
Black -- Farewell
Peach -- Modesty, Gratitude, Admiration and Sympathy Pink (Pale) -- Grace, Joy and Happiness
Red/White -- Unity or Engagement
Yellow/Orange -- Passionate Thoughts
Yellow/Red -- Congratulations
Rosebud -- Beauty, Youth and a Heart Innocent of Love
Red Rosebud -- Purity and Loveliness
White Rosebud -- Girlhood
One Dozen Red Roses -- "I Love You"
Single Red Rose in Full Bloom -- "I Love You"

HANDS -- The hands of a lady has been a favorite decoration for Valentine's Day for many years and is suppose to depict "femininity". To add to its beauty, the hand is often decorated with frilly cuff and a jeweled ring on the third finger. A lady's hands was a favorite decoration that depicted "femininity." Its beauty was enhanced by adding a frilly cuff and a jeweled ring on the third finger. Clasped hands are said to represent those of Queen Victoria and her consort, Prince Albert...the symbol of friendship between their respective countries of England and Germany.

DOVES and LOVE BIRDS -- It was the popular belief that birds chose their mate for the year on February 14.Since doves and pigeons mate for life ,they symbolize loyalty, fidelity and love. Lovebirds, the small birds with colorful plumage, commonly found in Africa, are so called because they tend to get cozy with each other and can't survive without each other. pairs. Doves...common urban birds, shy and gentle by nature, with a distinctive "cooing" call...symbolize loyalty, fidelity and love .

LOVE KNOTS -- They are made of ribbons and are traditional symbols of interminable and everlasting love.





History of VALENTINE’S DAYAs early as the fourth century B.C., the Romans engaged in an annual young man's rite to passage to the God Lupercus. The names of the teenage women were placed in a box and drawn at random by adolescent men; thus, a man was assigned a woman companion for the duration of the year, after which another lottery was staged. After eight hundred years of this cruel practice, the early church fathers sought to end this practice... They found an answer in Valentine, a bishop who had been martyred some two hundred years earlier.According to church tradition St. Valentine was a priest near Rome in about the year 270 A.D. At that time the Roman Emperor Claudius-II who had issued an edict forbidding marriage.This was around when the heyday of Roman empire had almost come to an end. Lack of quality administrators led to frequent civil strife. Learning declined, taxation increased, and trade slumped to a low, precarious level. And the Gauls, Slavs, Huns, Turks and Mongolians from Northern Europe and Asian increased their pressure on the empire's boundaries. The empire was grown too large to be shielded from external aggression and internal chaos with existing forces. Thus more of capable men were required to be recruited as soldiers and officers. When Claudius became the emperor, he felt that married men were more emotionally attached to their families, and thus, will not make good soldiers. So to assure quality soldiers, he banned marriage.Valentine, a bishop , seeing the trauma of young lovers, met them in a secret place, and joined them in the sacrament of matrimony. Claudius learned of this "friend of lovers," and had him arrested. The emperor, impressed with the young priest's dignity and conviction, attempted to convert him to the roman gods, to save him from certain execution. Valentine refused to recognize Roman Gods and even attempted to convert the emperor, knowing the consequences fully.On February 24, 270, Valentine was executed."From your Valentine"While Valentine was in prison awaiting his fate, he came in contact with his jailor, Asterius. The jailor had a blind daughter. Asterius requested him to heal his daughter. Through his faith he miraculously restored the sight of Asterius' daughter. Just before his execution, he asked for a pen and paper from his jailor, and signed a farewell message to her "From Your Valentine," a phrase that lived ever after.Valentine thus become a Patron Saint, and spiritual overseer of an annual festival. The festival involved young Romans offering women they admired, and wished to court, handwritten greetings of affection on February 14. The greeting cards acquired St.Valentine's name.The Valentine's Day card spread with Christianity, and is now celebrated all over the world. One of the earliest card was sent in 1415 by Charles, duke of Orleans, to his wife while he was a prisoner in the Tower of London. The card is now preserved in the British Museum.

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Why Friday the 13th Is Unlucky

The Unluckiest Day of All - The astute reader will have observed that while we have thus far insinuated any number of intriguing connections between events, practices and beliefs attributed to ancient cultures and the superstitious fear of Fridays and the number 13, we have yet to happen upon an explanation of how, why or when these separate strands of folklore converged — if that is indeed what happened — to mark Friday the 13th as the unluckiest day of all.
There's a very simple reason for that — nobody really knows, though various explanations have been proposed.

Bad FridayLEGEND HAS IT: Never change your bed on Friday; it will bring bad dreams. Don't start a trip on Friday or you will have misfortune. If you cut your nails on Friday, you cut them for sorrow. Ships that set sail on a Friday will have bad luck – as in the tale of H.M.S. Friday . One hundred years ago, the British government sought to quell once and for all the widespread superstition among seamen that setting sail on Fridays was unlucky. A special ship was commissioned, named "H.M.S. Friday." They laid her keel on a Friday, launched her on a Friday, selected her crew on a Friday and hired a man named Jim Friday to be her captain. To top it off, H.M.S. Friday embarked on her maiden voyage on a Friday, and was never seen or heard from again.

Some say Friday's bad reputation goes all the way back to the Garden of Eden.
It was on a Friday, supposedly, that Eve tempted Adam with the forbidden fruit. Adam bit, as we all learned in Sunday School, and they were both ejected from Paradise. Tradition also holds that the Great Flood began on a Friday; God tongue-tied the builders of the Tower of Babel on a Friday; the Temple of Solomon was destroyed on a Friday; and, of course, Friday was the day of the week on which Christ was crucified. It is therefore a day of penance for Christians.
In pagan Rome, Friday was execution day (later Hangman's Day in Britain), but in other pre-Christian cultures it was the sabbath, a day of worship, so those who indulged in secular or self-interested activities on that day could not expect to receive blessings from the gods — which may explain the lingering taboo on embarking on journeys or starting important projects on Fridays.

To complicate matters, these pagan associations were not lost on the early Church, which went to great lengths to suppress them. If Friday was a holy day for heathens, the Church fathers felt, it must not be so for Christians — thus it became known in the Middle Ages as the "Witches' Sabbath," and thereby hangs another tale.

13: The Devil's DozenLEGEND HAS IT: If 13 people sit down to dinner together, all will die within the year. The Turks so disliked the number 13 that it was practically expunged from their vocabulary (Brewer, 1894). Many cities do not have a 13th Street or a 13th Avenue. Many buildings don't have a 13th floor. If you have 13 letters in your name, you will have the devil's luck (Jack the Ripper, Charles Manson, Jeffrey Dahmer, Theodore Bundy and Albert De Salvo all have 13 letters in their names). There are 13 witches in a coven.

Though no one can say for sure when and why human beings first associated the number 13 with misfortune, the belief is assumed to be quite old, and there exist any number of theories — all of which have been called into question at one time or another, I should point out — purporting to trace its origins to antiquity and beyond. It has been proposed, for example, that fears surrounding the number 13 are as ancient as the act of counting. Primitive man had only his 10 fingers and two feet to represent units, this explanation goes, so he could count no higher than 12. What lay beyond that — 13 — was an impenetrable mystery to our prehistoric forebears, hence an object of superstition.

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Mens Sexual Health Fitness for Satisfying Sex

Paperback: 224 pages
Data: September 19, 2007
Format: PDF
Description: This book explains healthy male sexuality, written by, for and about men. It is for men and their partners as they negotiate their sexuality around healthy practices. The work is organized around three main topics - awareness and enhancement of sexuality, dealing with sexual problems, and lifelong healthy sexuality. A multidimensional model for a comprehensive understanding of sexual health and sexual problems founded on current biological, psychological, and medical research is discussed in terms appropriate for the general reader. The authors explore the barriers and problems that limit sexual practice, discuss how to pursue sexual and relationship health, enhance sexual satisfaction. Problems such as premature ejaculation, erectile dysfunction, inhibited sexual desire, ejaculatory inhibition and compulsive sexual behavior are examined in terms of their causes and prescriptions for treatment are offered. Exercises and activities engage the reader to highlight important points, provide skills training, and stimulate healthy sexual practice.


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